Wednesday, March 16, 2011

What A Beautiful Morning

Ah yes, RAIN, I love rain when I have nowhere to go. Its so comforting and gloomy. BUT then the sun eventually started to shine, so I had to get motivated and do some things. Blah. I did make it to the gym for a complete hour today, 3rd day in a row! Then when I got home a took a walk around the neighborhood because I needed to mail my Netflix movie back. Funny thing I viewed on that walk was an older gentleman on the other side of the street holding a Netflix movie too. What are the odds? ha ha

Home bound I was for the rest of the day. Chatted with a few individuals but nothing to keep me occupied so I made myself some lunch, ate a few cookies I baked and watched The OC. I wish I knew why I am so entertained by that show? I am almost finished with kitty cat tissue box cover! A few more chapters were completed in my Photoshop book, but that gets boring really quick. I have yet to start my medical terminology book. See this right here is why I don't go to school. I can't do things on other people's time. I don't "procrastinate" I just have to do it when my mind is right. I can't be forced into it.

I've been tracking my calories on this App on my Droid called My Fitness Pal. Its been working really well. I can track everything, workouts, food, water etc. We'll see in two weeks when I go back to the doctor if I lost any weight. I hope at least something.

I think I am having some paranoia right now because every pain I have been thinking I am dying from the new medication. I'll call Toby and ask if something is normal, ha ha. He just tells me the answer he knows I want to hear. Got to love him <3

Seeming that I've told my whole life's story today, I am going to head off to la la land.

Hugs & Kisses,
Miss Frantic <3

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Train of Thought..

I am like that little kid who runs around like crazy and screams out the most bizarre shit. I can't focus to save me. I have to be doing ten things at one time. Its annoying sometimes, but I get bored too easily. I notice when someone is telling me a story, I have a tendency to think about something else or watch someone else, yet I still know what the person was telling me....

I meant to post earlier but I kept getting sidetracked. Thinking about too much. However I am enjoying listening to some Britney Spears. Toby and  I watched a movie tonight, it was called Charlie St. Cloud. It was very good. Kind of depressing, but good.

Two days going strong on my sleep schedule AND going to the gym. I have to take my wins as they come. ha ha. Oh and I have also cooked dinner two nights in a row too. I am proud of myself. lol.

I did nothing special today. I am kind of giving myself a break from "life" the storm clouds will come soon enough. I don't think the whole bar tending thing will pan out. Maybe another time. Just need to look for a small part time job. I will get into all that next week. I just want to get my "schedule" down. I feel much more sane but still having my episodes of sadness and hopelessness. My anxiety has calmed down because I have not been putting myself into any situations to cause it, like The Hartford. ha ha

I do have a something to look forward to on Friday! A girl's night out, yay!!!

Well I think that's all besides saying that my cats are driving me insane!!!!

Hugs & Kisses,
Miss Frantic

Monday, March 14, 2011

First Day For Change?

Well this is my first official day of (chosen) unemployment. My mind could no longer handle the useless garbage I was hearing on a daily basis. The timing felt right, and I just need to make sure I use my time wisely. I do feel that this is a better decision then losing my mind completely, that would be embarrassing.

What did I do today? Hmm well I felt I was pretty productive. My mood was positive and I finally felt some energy. Though this does happen from time to time when I am on top of the world for a few days and then I crash and hate everything/one around me. Horrible right?

Well I finally sat down to eat my breakfast and started my "anti-depression" medication. It is told that I may be a manic-depressive person, well what the hell? No side effects so far, so we are doing alright. Then I wanted to go on the Internet to check my Facebook (its disgustingly addictive) BUT my Internet was down, so I chose to go to the gym early. Did about thirty minutes on the treadmill. Baby steps for me, I am just getting back into it.

Then I went to the post office, I officially know where all the old people hang out when they are not bitching and complaining! Ha!(inside joke from where I used to work.) I love nice and sweet old people!! Then I visited the Allentown Bartending School. It may be a new direction for me, but nothing is set in stone. Lastly, I took a trip to the grocery store. All I needed was a jar of brown gravy, and I walked out with gravy, 3 boxes of mac & cheese and some bagel bites. Yummy. Not the healthiest choices, but good in moderation!

Of course I spent some time crafting and watching The OC. Only two episodes today. Even thought I have probably seen all the episodes about 20 times. It's my guilty pleasure. I have also gotten a hold of Photoshop CS5 and have a book that is teaching me some tips and tricks. Got through chapter 3, no too bad. I did make dinner tonight. Some homemade meatloaf, noodles and corn. Toby enjoyed dinner, he always does when I actually cook. I even did a load of laundry. Them we started a new show; Dexter, since we got our Netflix back. It's okay. Toby said it best; "It is like a cross between American Psycho & Nip Tuck."

Well I set a bedtime for myself, and I want to stick with it. I think I need to have more of a steady sleep schedule to help with everything so I chose 12-8am. We shall see how it works.

Love & Hugs;
Miss Frantic <3
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